A Typical Conversation on the Way to Work…
Subaru: Where’d you guys go to dinner last night?
Me: A Chinese place called, “Yuan Tung.” Pretty tasty.
Subaru: Yeah, that’s an old Karachi favourite.
Me: I wouldn’t know.
Subaru: No you wouldn’t.
Me: Right. Well, it’s across the street from another Chinese restaurant called “Little China.” But I didn’t want to go there because I’ve heard they had some big trouble a little while back.
Subaru: Ha! Big Trouble in Little China.
Me: You nailed that one.
Subaru: Ya, that was a classic film.
Me: Never seen it, I just make jokes about the title… Kurt Russel right?
Subaru: Yeah, basically, there’s this demon loose in China-Town…
Me: Wait, I think you mean, “Little China”… hey wouldn’t it be funny if there was actually a Little China full of Chinese midgets?
Subaru: Shut up Dave.
Me: What? It just strikes me as something those wily Chinese might do. Anyway, there’s a demon…?
Subaru: Right. And the demon has been hunting for thousands of years for a green eyed Chinese girl.
Me: Virgin?
Subaru: Couldn’t hurt. So Kurt Russel’s friend is dating a green-eyed, Chinese girl.
Me: Convenient.
Subaru: So the Kung-Fu guys that worship the demon go after the girl, and the Kung-Fu guys that support Kurt Russel go after them.
Me: Were those cats as fast as lightening?
Subaru: Ya. It was a little bit frightening.
Me: So then?
Subaru: So then, I dunno, a whole lot of shit goes down.
Me: Ok, so two Kung-Fu gangs are battling an ancient demon for a green-eyed girl and then a whole lot of shit goes down.
Subaru: Pretty Much. Oh, and it also features an early appearance of Kim Cattrall.
Me: Who’s Kim Cattrall.
Subaru: The old, slutty one on Sex and the City.
Me: Isn’t that all of them?
Subaru: The oldest and sluttiest.
Me: Oh right. You’re a big fan are ya?
Subaru: I’m not the one who’s seen every episode of Desperate Housewives.
Me: I’m telling you, it’s a good show! And since I’m an honest guy, I’ll tell you that while you were at work last Saturday I watched Season Six of Sex and the City.
Subaru: What!
Me: In my defence, there are a lot of naked women in that show.
Subaru: A lot of naked men too.
Me: That’s why you watch it, you mean?
Subaru: Shut up.
Me: You shut up.
Subaru: Anyway, now I’m thinking we’d better find a copy of “Big Trouble…”
Me: Oh yeah, sounds like a quality film. We should track it down.
Subaru: But we won’t.
Me: No, no we won’t.
I wonder how many people will remember that masterpiece!
I thought you weren’t going to become a photo blogger?
i’m a proud owner of the double dvd edition director’s cut of big trouble in little china. it’s a master piece.
Sounds like a walking to work version of bedtime talk.
Jeff, why do you always make us sound so gay?
I didn’t mean us….that could be with anyone.
At least we were never in the same bed for it. Except once, I guess, where you discovered the Light Game.
Dammit, back to sounding gay.
What is the Light Game?
I’m offended! Kim Cattrall is hot! Dammit. I want to look like her when I’m in my forties.
wouldn’t want the ladies to think you are gay guys… really cut down on the trying to pick up chicks thing!
so where’s the report on the standup show you had?